Friday, June 08, 2018

Dear Grandma RE: Preschool Themes

I've decided that I'm going to start recording some of my responses to my grandmother. Ever since my other grandmother died 14 years ago, she writes me every day. She lets me know she's still there and still alive.

May 31, 2018

Hi Heather:
Checking in and all seems okay here. I didn't know you were planning to attend Pima. Tell me more when you have time.

Have a good one.
Love, GB

Yeah, I think I made that decision a couple weeks ago when I decided I didn't want to spend the next 1/5 of my life struggling to work full time and go to school for a bachelors degree to teach. All of my "advisors" (therapists, lawyer, etc) tell me I have a good 30 years left of my working life. Getting a bachelors degree while working full time will take AT LEAST 6 years. So, I said, "FUCK IT" and decided to do something else on my list of possible jobs that were good fits for me. I took 3 tests back in December or so to decide what career would be good for me. Teaching, medical and graphic design were on the list.

All of the medical degrees were competitive and I could end up on a waiting list and I didn't want the extra stress.

So, after thinking about it, I made the decision that I was staying in the school district to work so I can have the same time off as the kids. I'm worried about the kids being alone during extended school breaks. Christmas break was when one of Kat's friends killed himself. My kids are too emotional to be left alone for long periods of time. And besides, I really like working with the kids.

I need at least 30 hours in Amphi and that gets me medical and dental coverage. And they have a GREAT retirement program.

So, I can go to school part time and learn how to design web pages, business cards, etc. I can do that on the side when I feel like it. I can also incorporate my photography and I want to learn how to fix my own computer. I'll still be working with Jay as much as I can and the first thing I'm going to do is fix his stupid web page.

Once Kat graduates, I can either stay at what I'm doing, increase my hours at the school or just find a job doing graphic design and I'll already have experience.

My other idea was to make some new kid friendly books or videos. Having been in preschool this year, I've noticed some strange themes in Children's stories. There is always some old lady eating things she's not supposed to. You know, "I know an old lady that swallowed a fly. I don't know why she swallowed the fly. Perhaps she'll die. I know an old lady that swallowed a spider. She swallowed the spider to catch the fly...." etc. They're ALWAYS old ladies and there are several stories and her diet changes depending on the time of year.

There is also that damn story, "If you give a mouse a cookie". I'm sure you know that story. Well, that damn mouse has ADHD and can NEVER finish a damn project. They make short movies based on that story and they drive me nuts. I just want to scream, "FINISH YOUR DAMN PROJECT BEFORE YOU MOVE ON TO HELP MR. MOOSE. MR. MOOSE CAN WAIT". And then he never finishes Mr. Moose because some other idiot comes up and needs help and so he leaves Mr. Moose and goes to help someone else and it just keeps going and going until he makes a big ass mess. I can't stand it.

There is also the story about the kid that wants his grandmother to knit him some mittens. When she asks what color, he says, "white". Well of course the grandmother tells him he's going to lose the mittens in the snow but the little shit insists and she makes him white mittens. Well, guess what happens? He loses one of those damn mittens just like he was warned and THEN a bunch of animals find it and start living in it. The story is completely unrealistic because we have a mouse living in there with a bunch of other carnivores.

I say that the story is about the desperation of homelessness but everyone else always says that it's about working together and living in harmony. We had to just agree to disagree on that one.

There is also a few stories where working men fuck everything up and who has to come to their rescue? Their wives. Their wives are the ones that have to fix the big messes that their husbands make. I suppose that is one of the more realistic stories.

There is also an animated movie that the kids love where the characters are in a jungle playing with dangerous animals. It's called Animal Boogie Oogie Woogie or something like that. The characters all have oversized, very wrinkled clothing and they play with animals like cobras, vultures (in fact, the one that plays with a giant oversized vulture is a child in a wheel chair. The way that vulture eyes her is scary because he knows she can't run away) and some sort of tiger or something. Their depiction of the tiger is not even real. It looks more like a saber tooth tiger with it's giant fangs hanging 6 inches out of its mouth.

At the end of the movie, I always have to say, "Never play with wild animals" because I'm afraid the kids are going to come across a snake somewhere and try to ride it like they do in the movie.

So, that's my story. :)

Enjoy your day.



Thank you for the long letter telling me about all the decisions you've make lately. For what it's worth, I think you've made some good ones and, obviously, thought it all out well. Your photo ability should not go to waste. Working the same hours as the kids are in school makes sense. Just don't wear yourself out. Get lots of sleep!

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